how long before condemnation?
the day is approaching. i’m still waiting.
all i need is a hint of return.

release too kind a word for this unrest.
what i want to say won’t come.

i’m in a world you’ve never touched.
want has been discarded, this scenario unkind.

i’m humiliating
myself but you do love me, don’t you?

we can flirt with the waste of the world
& still come home
tail tucked between our shameful legs.

sometimes i think
i just need a new good obsession
but nothing’s lifelike as you.

there’s an abandonment
of expectation
that’s actually really damaging.

the lies we tell ourselves
about how we remember things
you said so much through what you didn’t say.

i kept thinking & thinking
there’s something else coming
but that’s it.